Can't believe it is already the 7th January. Where does the time go??? What's really different about this New Year than any others is that I haven't given myself resolutions and expectations about what I will do for the new year, ie exercise more, eat less, eat healthy, walk more etc etc. I normally make myself a list every New Year and try my best to stick to it. You know what, that has happened for about the last 25 years and here I am, fatter than ever. Derrrrr, why has it taken me this long to figure out it aint working. As Dr Phil says, if it aint working for ya, then change what you are doing.
Well, I definitely have changed and it doesn't mean change my diet plan or exercise plan, like it normally would. I always figured it was me not the diet that was the problem - now I know different!! I also can't believe I have not weighed myself in about 3 months - wow, unbelievable. I feel great, I really really do. You gotta try this guys, it is life changing.
I am positive I haven't gained weight either cause my clothes fit just the same - not looser, not tighter. I'm happy with that for the time being. I know weightloss will happen but my body has to recover from the 25 years of dieting and binge eating, over and over again.
I have noticed over the last month that I can look at chocolate now, or cake, or pizza, fish n chips, you name it and not start salivating or thinking that I HAVE to have it. I know I can have it if I want it but I can ask myself the question - do I want it now? Am I hungry for that now? Is there something else I feel like? And I have turned my back on some of those foods and not thought twice about it - that is definitely a first for me.
I am slowly (not quite there) starting to love myself and this body that I have made. I appreciate my body for what it has done for me all these years and put up with the abuse I have given it and the crap that has gone down my mouth - it makes me sad! Diets have done this to me! For that I am sure.
I vow, from this day forward (well actually from 3 months ago) that I shall NEVER, EVER, EVER go on another weightloss diet again. If I stay the weight I am then so be it, I am not dieting again. Wheww, that really takes a load off my mind and by the way, I haven't binged either or felt the need to.
This is going to be a slow process, I know that. But I have to now think of the future, my future and how I want to live. I do not want to live counting calories or points or carbs or whatever, I just am OVER IT!!
So here is to 2010 and may it be everything I wish it to be and the same for anybody else who may be reading this. HAPPY NEW YEAR...
Sharon
